Secret Santa Claus Club, author Jeff Janke- Guest Post

Why do we spend so much time and effort creating a fairytale world for our children, just to take it away from them? Author Jeff Janke faced that dilemma three years ago when his daughter started questioning her belief in Santa Claus. Like most parents, he had two problems to solve–how to gently teach his child the true meaning of Christmas, and how to prevent her from spoiling the fairytale for other children. Out of this problem, Secret Santa Claus Club was born.

Secret Santa Claus Club is a beautifully illustrated story about a little girl thinking back on the magic of each Christmas. She remembers meeting Santa at the mall and seeing her first bike under the tree on Christmas morning. As time goes on, she starts to wonder if it’s all real. When she decides she’s ready to know the truth–her parents help guide her to the true meaning of the holiday.

Secret Santa Claus Club was written to be a tool for parents during these challenging moments. Combined with love, patience, and compassion, SSCC will help transition the reader from believing to becoming. At the end of the story, your child will be invited to join Secret Santa Claus Club. They’ll understand the importance of keeping the secret, creating the magic for believers, and helping other members of the club.

Secret Santa Claus Club Book Cover
Secret Santa Claus Club

See the tour–wide giveaway at the end.

A Reader’s Review

“I recommend using Secret Santa Claus Club to help break the news to any child. Or if your kid knows already, like mine did, it can help put the strange idea of “becoming” Santa into perspective. There’s some emphasis on keeping the secret from other believers (and helping spread the magic), which I really appreciate. Very glad I purchased. The quality is excellent.  But most importantly, the story is really sweet.”

— Erin M. (Amazon reviewer)

Secret Santa Claus Club Page 34
Secret Santa Claus Club Page 34

A Parent’s Guide to Navigating the Santa Talk: How to Use a Secret Club to Help Support the Truth and Transition your Child

My daughter, River, was 9 when she started to question Santa Claus. It really took me off guard, but I knew this momentous occasion deserved something special. I couldn’t find the exact solution I was hunting for, so we held off telling her and I spent a year writing her a book.

I had several goals in mind, some driven by common fears all parents have in my shoes.

  1. I wanted to make sure she didn’t feel betrayed. Saint Nick was real after all! But would she feel like I lied to her all these years?
  2. I wanted to keep Christmas special and full of magic. I didn’t want it to lose its luster.
  3. I needed to hold her accountable for all the believers in her life. I didn’t want her to spoil the secret for any of her peers.
  4. And I wondered if I could replace feelings of exclusivity with inclusivity.

These goals and fears are what drove me to my light bulb moment. The Secret Santa Claus Club was born. 5 years later, I can say it worked better than I ever imagined.

__________________________________

Here are the steps I took, the insights I gained, and the changes I would make:

Make Your Own Club Rules:

For me, I focused on spreading the magic and keeping the secret. Of course, every family will have their own unique approach. In a nutshell, here are my SSCC Rules:

  1. Respect all Santas, including mall Santas and parents dressed as Santa
  2. Help fill stockings
  3. Never share the secret with any believer, no matter how young or old
  4. Only caregivers can invite members into the club
  5. Always leave milk and cookies
  6. Carry on all the same Christmas Traditions with love and joyfully give to others

Find other members:

If your child has a tight-knit crew, find out who’s in the know and who isn’t. Share the concept of your club with family members and parents. Encourage them to extend their warm welcome to your child. River loved the feeling of community once older folks started talking about “the club”.

Find believers:

It’s helpful to know who to guard the secret from. And it’s also fun to pick a few close believers—like siblings or friends—and perform “acts of magic” for them. More on this below.

Create Club Activities:

Spreading the magic was a huge emphasis for us. River loved finding out how her mom and I made magic for her over the years. It gave her great ideas on how to pass it on. Some examples of club activities are writing letters from Santa to younger siblings or friends, or picking out stocking gifts for the family and stuffing them.

Charity:

I wish I specifically mentioned charity in our written club rules, but we always make sure to focus on it during the holidays. There’s no better way to honor the legacy of St. Nick than by giving to those in need. We started the tradition of finding someone in our community less fortunate, brainstorming a helpful gift, and leaving it for them anonymously. We also have River pick out 5 of her toys to donate. This helps make room for what’s coming.

Make it official:

If you’d like to make it more official and are crafty, make a badge, ID Card, patch, certificate, or ornament. We printed the club rules on linen certificate paper and I was so surprised at how much River studied those rules!

Celebrate:

Don’t forget to celebrate the induction of the club like a graduation or special achievement. This is a big deal! A rite of passage! Ask other adults to recognize the newest member into the club. A talk with family ahead of time can really make the transition special.

———————————————————-

One of the best parts about using the Secret Santa Claus Club was the way it transformed the event from a potential tragedy into an adventure. Once River joined the club, there was so much for her to look forward to; it replaced the magic that Santa supplied with a whole new world of magic of her own making.

If you’d like a tool to help your family start this conversation and introduce your child to the Secret Santa Claus Club, grab a copy of my children’s book!  https://a.co/d/2tk9rFD You certainly don’t need it to have a successful transition, but it can be helpful. I also have lots of helpful blogs on my website: www.secretsantaclausclub.com 

 

Happy holidays to you and your family and best of luck to you!

—Jeff Janke

Secret Santa Clause Club at Amazon.

SSCC Page 26
Page 26 of SSCC
We are doing a tour–wide giveaway of a book, club sticker, and club postcard. Jeff has EIGHT sets available for US and/or Canada winners.

Just click below.

http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/463009dc8/

Jeff Janke
Jeff Janke

Author Bio:

Jeff Janke is a single dad who considers himself more of a problem solver than an author. When his daughter started questioning Santa, he wrote a book to help guide her from a world of believing in Santa to a community of truly becoming Santa. When his daughter wanted to invite other friends into the club (after they learned the secret), and after lots of encouragement from friends and family who have faced the same dilemma, he decided to publish Secret Santa Claus Club to help other parents and children too!

Website: https://www.secretsantaclausclub.com/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/secretsantaclausclub/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/SecretSantaClausClub

Amazon: https://amzn.to/45T1H7r

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/63391605-secret-santa-claus-club

 

Jeff Janke blog tour
Jeff Janke blog tour

 

© 2014-2023- Ronovan Hester Copyright reserved. The author asserts his moral and legal rights over this work.

Can a Novel Really Change Anything? – A Guest Post by author Lee Schneider.

Can a Novel Really Change Anything?

By Lee Schneider

They say “you are what you read.” Can your reading habits change the world?

Cover of Surrender by author Lee Schneider
Surrender by Lee Schneider

Novels are an ideal delivery system for ideas that shake things up. Upton Sinclair’s The Jungle, published in 1906, took the meatpacking industry to task for its treatment of workers. The novel, and the movement that grew around it, spurred on the public lobby for government regulation of meatpacking, including passage of the Meat Inspection Act and the Pure Food and Drug Act. George Orwell’s 1984, published in 1949, is quoted often today as we grapple with the power of centralized government and the ways we can deploy technology as an instrument of control. Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale, published in 1985, depicts a timely fight many people are in now about reproductive freedoms. Ursula K. Le Guin’s The Left Hand of Darkness, published in 1969, opened up readers to gender fluidity, a topic that has become politicized now.

If we consider political or world-shaking novels like Norman Mailer’s Armies of the Night, (1968) or Philip Roth’s Portnoy’s Complaint, (1969) Toni Morrison’s Beloved (1987), or non-fiction, like Rachel Carson’s Silent Spring, which warned in 1962 of the ecological disaster we face now, our list of books that have the potential to change the world will get long. I don’t have that much room on my night table!

But if we limit our reading list to speculative science fiction only, books like 1984, The Handmaid’s Tale, The Left Hand of Darkness and the like, we will read stories that have a way of telling us more about the present than about the future they depict. I’d call speculative science fiction writing an exaggeration of the present, a way to see the present through the lens of the future.

Pick up a copy of Isaac Asimov’s I, Robot stories, published in 1950, and you might find the prose a little stiff and some ideas dated, but you’ll not be able to ignore that these stories have become the instruction book for how we might respond to robots who are gaining on us in intelligence and even consciousness. Programmers who make chatbots today have to consider the ideas and predicaments and moral problems brought up by Asimov. 1984 is a must-read today to frame what is going on now with the surveillance capitalism imposed on us by Meta and Google. 1984 is a vital read to understand digital censorship of public libraries by public officials and other advocates. The facial recognition technology used by police departments sounds like something Orwell imagined. But it is here today.

It’s useful to look back to the science fiction novels of the past to understand the present, and novels published today will provide the interpretation we need of tomorrow. The Three-Body Problem, with its notion of an alien invasion in the works for 400 years, or The New Wilderness, with its story about how we might find our place in nature from now on, may be the books we turn to for an explanation soon, when we wonder what in the world happened to civilization or how our world has changed so much in so short a time.

Now, you may say to yourself, people may read all these books, but they really change things? Are any minds really changed? They can be, if we are thinking about culture change.

Heather White, author of One Green Thing, has an example for us. She writes that if each one of us does one small thing to address climate change, it will eventually result in a culture change around climate. It seems like a tall order for a thought to do all that, but if held by enough people, it can change the world. After all, if hashtags like #blacklivesmatter or #metoo can focus social action, why not a novel?

Lee Schneider Author
Lee Schneider

About the Author:

Lee Schneider is a novelist and non-fiction writer. His most recent book is Surrender, a speculative science fiction story set in 2050 with a climate change theme. It’s available on Amazon, Apple Books, bookshop.org, and Barnes & Noble. His website is https://futurex.studio.

The Walk-On a true Chicago story.

The Walk-On a true Chicago Story

Guest Post

by Author

Richard Podkowski

 

The Walk-On by Richard Podkowski cover
The Walk-On by Richard Podkowski

In The Walk-On, Mike “the Steelman” Stalowski is a blue-collar kid who grew up in the shadows of the Chicago steel mills, where hard-working immigrants poured molten steel 24/7 while smokestacks belched black smoke until they were shuttered in the mid-70s. The word steel in Polish is “stal” which is the root of the Steelman’s surname. Technically, my interpretation means he’s made of steel.

Chicago, one of the most diverse cities in the world, has many nicknames including Chi-town, City of Big Shoulders, Windy City, Second City, and oddly for most, the Third Coast. Although if you’ve ever been on the lakefront, you understand.

Many people have heard of the South, North and West Sides. No East Side as you’d be in Lake Michigan. The city has over 200 distinct neighborhoods. You’ll find the Steelman in Hegewisch, Lincoln Park, Little Italy, Wrigleyville and the Gold Coast. The long-standing North Side / South Side rivalry is real. One of my characters from the South Side mocks a friend from the North Side for not venturing farther south than Roosevelt Road. Technically, the dividing line is Madison Street. Ironically, both live in the western suburbs, which is another rivalry.

The South Side is known for being more blue-collar, and it definitely has some of the city’s most poverty-stricken neighborhoods. Conversely, the white-collar North Side includes the bustling downtown area, with its well-known skyscrapers, lakefront recreation and residential high-rises, mansions, upscale eateries and shopping options, and numerous cultural destinations.

I am proud to have grown up on the South Side. We were certainly blue-collar, poor actually, and I lived in a tiny cottage bungalow. Like Stalowski, my parents were Polish immigrants who came to Chicago seeking a better life. My dad toiled in the South Side stockyards until he became a printer. My mother worked on a Westinghouse Corporation factory assembly line, alongside other Polish and Hispanic women. She didn’t speak good English, and she didn’t speak bad Spanish. They got along just fine.

I didn’t visit downtown until I was in 1st or 2nd grade and never dreamed I would one day attend Loyola University on the North Side lakefront. In all fairness, I confess that after becoming empty-nesters, my wife and I lived in East Lakeview and loved it. We walked everywhere: grocery store, gym, church, Wrigley Field, live theater, restaurants, Lincoln Park and even to the glitzy Magnificent Mile on North Michigan Avenue. Can’t do that in the towns  of area codes 708, 630, or 847.

The baseball rivalry is real too. The Cubs are the North Side heroes. The White Sox are their South Side rivals. Fortunately, the whole city roots for the Bulls, Blackhawks and Chicago Bears. In The Walk-On, the city cheers for the fictional NFL Chicago Storm. As the book begins, Mike “the Steelman” Stalowski, notorious hometown hero hailing from the South Side, has been a fan favorite for years.

I hope you’ll enjoy Mike’s escapades around Chicago — my beloved hometown.

You may purchase The Walk-On at Amazon.

Richard Podkowski headshot suit
Richard Podkowski

About the Author

Richard Podkowski, a native of Chicago’s South Side, began writing fiction while studying criminal justice at Loyola University Chicago.
As a United States Secret Service special agent, Richard protected U.S. presidents and foreign dignitaries and investigated major domestic and international financial crimes until he retired in 2003.
Richard’s projects include a Christmas romantic comedy screenplay and a crime story, both
currently in the works. In his free time, Richard enjoys riding his road bike, working out, and
making Christmas ornaments. He currently resides with his wife in Los Angeles.

Website: https://richardpodkowski.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/richard.podkowski
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/richard_podkowski

 

Richard Podkowski Blog Tour
Richard Podkowski Blog Tour

© 2014-2023- Ronovan Hester Copyright reserved. The author asserts his moral and legal rights over this work.

Andrew & The Treasured Spirit of the Northland – Guest Post by Author Able Barrett

Andrew & The Treasured Spirit of the Northland

I enter the darkness that has been cultured for thousands of years, the legends of life gone by, ringing within its corridors with a deafening silence. I feel the presence of both good and evil, which seem to loosely pull at me. Which direction to take? A light can only slightly penetrate the thickness of the darkness. Faces begin to appear as ghost-like images; it’s a warning, which I do not heed.

The images become clearer. They are the faces of beautiful women, goddesses perhaps; they draw my very being deeper into the darkness, serenaded by their gentle voices lifting away my fear of the unknown. I am floating now, effortlessly on a bed of soft blowing air. I am totally consumed. Have I fallen under a spell? I call out for help.

Suddenly there is a flash of brilliant light and the real faces of the women are revealed to me. They are the true evil ones, the guardians of the darkness, the Temptress Sirens of the Dark Lords. They have surrounded me. I see a faint light in the distance. I begin to run towards the light, I feel Temptress Sirens clawing at me as I try to go towards the light in hopes of a safe passage. I hear a voice ever so softly… “Don’t go to the light……. Don’t go to the light……. It will deceive you. Use your faith and follow your heart.”

I stop but I can feel the Temptress Sirens stalking me. I move through the
complete darkness with my eyes closed now. There then appears a golden mist that forms a stairway leading upward through the darkness. Without hesitation, I follow the stairway climbing slowly out of the darkness. I can still feel the draw of the Temptress Sirens at my back growing stronger. I become weary as I continue to climb. The strength of the Temptress Sirens is beginning to hold me back. I fear I cannot make it to the top. A silhouetted hand appears from out of the darkness above me. I do not know whether to take it. I have no choice. I grab the hand and a gentle pull brings me away from the grasp of the Temptress Sirens. I hear their shrieks of madness slowly fade away as I am pulled forward.

A gentle light appears and an Angel appears before me. She has the youthful
beauty of a thousand ages. I hear her gentle voice speaking to me yet her lips do not move. Her name is Afriel. She is a being of light charged with safeguarding young life. She is to protect that which is youthful and tenderly growing within each of us, no matter how old we actually are. Afriel grants youth, vigor, and vitality. She places her hand on my forehead and closes her eyes as she nods her head and says, “go forward and save your brother, Nicholas.”

The Great Tree coverAndrew and his older brother Nicholas were separated as children.

Nicholas had been snatched away by the Prince of Darkness, and Andrew had all but given up hope, but now their mother is ill, and he’s determined to reunite them before she passes – despite her objections.

With his dog Jenny by his side, Andrew sets out on an epic and perilous crusade well beyond his wildest imagination, facing evil protectors, giant wolves, dark magic, Sorcerers, Goblins, and even the Prince of Darkness himself.

Then there’s The Great Tree.

It’s enormous, with a presence that’s nearly impossible to describe…

And it’s clearly the heart of the kingdom of the wicked Sorcerer.

This is the setting for the adventure story that changed Christmas forever!

All proceeds from the sale of The Great Tree go to The Last Road Dog Animal Sanctuary to rescue unadoptable dogs, cats, and horses, an approved 501 (c)(3) Animal Public Welfare Charity that greatly appreciates the ongoing support of readers like you!

Jenny the dog is based on a very real Jenny, the author’s vision of a true warrior – who has her own inspiring story that he’s happy to share with anyone who asks.

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0BGK2ZNJF
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/60553311-the-great-tree

Author Links:
Website: www.thelastroaddog.com
Twitter: https://twitter.com/TLRDSANCTUARY
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blkdogr4/

Able Berrett photoAuthor Bio:
Able Barrett is a former Los Angeles County Deputy District Attorney and U.S. Department of Justice Organized Crime Strike Force Prosecutor who shamelessly admits he loves animals more than most people, and he’s the manager of The Last Road Dog Animal Sanctuary.

Able Barrett Blog Tour Image

© 2014-2022- Ronovan Hester Copyright reserved. The author asserts his moral and legal rights over this work.

Cathy A Lewis and Her Inspiration for The Road We Took.

“The discovery of my family lineage through ancestry, and the role that this played in my desire to preserve history.”

Cathy A. Lewis HeadshotIn 2018 I had ankle surgery which side-lined me from my work as a Chef. There would be no walking for six months, and I found it imperative to have a creative project to keep me from going bonkers during the lengthy recovery.

When my dad passed away in 1995, a small suitcase came into my possession. The suitcase contained all the artifacts and souvenirs from my dad’s 1933 six-week excursion through Europe. He was on the way to the Boy Scout World Jamboree, held in Godollo, Hungary, during the first
two weeks in August. The trip took place during the height of the depression. I was surprised to find he went on the journey with fifty dollars in his pocket. My dad was sixteen-almost seventeen at the time.

I had every intention of returning to the suitcase, but for the time being, I left it for an occasion when I could devote adequate attention to investigating  the contents. It took me twenty-three years to return to it.

A week before surgery, I finally got down to business by waking the suitcase from its quiet repose.

I felt like I was digging into a buried treasure. To my surprise, I found a rare jewel-my dad’s journal, filled with details from his entire trip through Europe, beginning on day one, leaving the Port of New York. Dad’s journal was full of information, recorded daily, about what he saw and experienced.

As I surveyed the suitcase’s contents, bits and pieces of conversations about his trip and time with the Boy Scouts shared with me in my youth came rushing back to the forefront of my mind.

While reading the journal, one entry, in particular, shook me, causing my spine to tighten. While in Vienna, Dad wrote about a conversation he had with a Hitler Youth. The conversation took place while he strolled the streets of Vienna with some of his troopmates. It was there they caught the attention of a boy about the same age as them.

The boy’s name was Wolfren Wolften. He was a former Boy Scout, now a Hitler Youth. The Hitler Youth uniform consisted of a brown shirt and black shorts, with a Sam Bowie belt stretched across the chest. On the sleeves of the shirt were Nazi armbands. Upon the head, a cap. To some degree, the Hitler Youth uniform seemed modeled after the Boy Scout uniform.

Wolfren spoke of a speech Hitler gave soon after coming into power as Chancellor of Germany on January 30 th , 1933. In the spring of 1933, Hitler proclaimed that no Austrian or German boy would attend the Jamboree to be held later that year, during the summer. Furthermore, Hitler decreed it compulsory to join the Hitler Youth. All boys of a certain age were forced to quit all other groups and activities. This young Austrian boy lamented that he could not attend the Jamboree. My dad wrote about conversing with him for some time. They had many interests in common.

They spoke at length about the Jamboree and what would take place. Later that evening, after returning to the hotel, dad wrote about the boy and the conversation that took place, concluding,

“I found him to be a fine fellow.”

That one entry, precisely those eight words, caused me to pause. Simultaneously, an idea began to form in my mind.

My dad did not know at the time that in ten years he would marry a Jewish immigrant whose extended family was murdered by the Nazis. I felt compelled to write at that moment, deciding to preserve the historical events conveyed by my dad’s writings.

I became fascinated with the last leg of dad’s trip and the four days he spent traveling through Germany before boarding the ship at Bremen back to the United States.

Dad detailed what he saw while traveling through Germany after the Jamboree.

He witnessed a massive rally and parade of German tanks, trucks, well over 100k armed forces, all marching through the streets of Munich. He noted that the Nazi symbol of the swastika was ubiquitous throughout Munich, with flags and banners covering every government building and many private homes. With all the tanks, trucks, and troops, the event was directly in violation of the Treaty of Versailles. While in Nuremberg, he wrote about a Hitler Youth rally with forty thousand members, all marching in formation while goose-stepping.

At that time, the world, by and large, had no idea what was going on in Germany. History would show that France and Great Britain knew. While the world was aware that Hitler was in power as Chancellor, the Treaty violations were not common knowledge. Dad saw these events taking place and wrote of them.

The second part of preserving my family history comes from my mom’s journey and her family.

While growing up in a suburb of Rochester, New York, I did not know about my family ties to the small border town of Baranovichi, Poland, now called Belarus. My mom told my siblings and me fables about her family, her ancestry, and like most children, we believed her.

We were not aware of the hidden anguish she carried, knowing her extended family died at the hands of Nazis. I was not aware I was Jewish until I was seven years old, and at that age, I had no understanding of what that meant.

My mom wanted us to believe her carefully constructed story of her upbringing. She desired to protect her children from the prejudice and hatred she suffered when first coming to the U.S. after marrying my dad in the canal zone in Panama in July of 1944, during the 2 nd World War.

My mom’s mother left Baranovichi in 1919 after World War I, traveling to Argentina. My grandmother traveled from Baranovichi to the Polish Corridor strip of land along the River Vistula to escape, traveling to Switzerland where she acquired a passport in Bern. My mom’s father’s journey to Argentina is somewhat of a mystery. Some accounts say he served to fight with the British Army during World War I, and at its conclusion, he took an British freighter to Argentina.

My grandparents allegedly had family living in Buenos Aires, where former Baranovichi residents Pauline Turetsky and Harry Silberstein re-connected and married. My mom’s birth certificate is from Buenos Aries, verifying she was born there.

The other facts of how my grandparents came to Buenos Aires remain unverified. Unfortunately, no one living can attest to the details of the journey—all who could have passed on.

My thirst for family history came too late in life to uncover the many mysteries that exist today. These perplexities haunt the recesses of my mind, leaving questions unanswered.

While the facts of my mom’s marriage to my dad are verified, I found a newspaper announcement of my parent’s wedding, written by my dad’s father, stating the contrary.

To compound matters and create further dissimulation, my grandfather published the wedding announcement of the marriage of his son “to the daughter of an Englishmen and a Mexican American woman.”

Clearly, he wanted to do everything he could to gaslight friends and family to prevent them from discovering that his eldest son married a Jewish immigrant.

Five years ago, I purchased a genealogy test. It was high time I took action to unravel the never-ending yarn ball of questions that kept me awake at night.

Another thing-my mom’s family dispersed from South America after sojourning through Argentina, Peru, and Ecuador. I have a photograph of a family passport from Peru to Ecuador with my mom, siblings, and parents.

My mom went to Panama to work, where she met and married my American dad. Some of her family moved to Mexico City from Ecuador, some went to Canada, and some eventually landed in Tel Aviv, Israel. I knew very few of my cousins or their extended families. My mom told me that they were all Orthodox and wouldn’t have anything to do with me, seeing that I wasn’t. I
took those words at face value.

I filled out the perfunctory questionnaires on the genealogy site, adding details to my profile. Using caution, I kept personal information to a bare minimum.

The results that came back astounded me, confirming me to be 49.9%  Ashkenazi Jewish on my mom’s side of the test. I felt a small victory over the doubt that assuaged my mind for years. The test also revealed that my Haplogroup of DNA showed my ancestors originated in Israel two
thousand years ago and dispersed from there, eventually landing in Eastern Europe, Poland. Finally, I felt like I was getting somewhere.

History confirms that the 2 nd diaspora of the Jewish people occurred with the Roman conquest of Israel two thousand years ago. The pieces of the puzzle started to come together.

Three months passed, and one day, an email arrived from the genealogical site. A man was inquiring about my family and me. He had the matching last name as my mom, but I had never heard of this person before. While initially suspect, I nevertheless began conversing with him through emails for several days. I subjected him to a series of hoop-jumping for my peace of mind. At first, I thought he was a quack or someone trying to obtain personal information. He satisfactorily completed the many tests to authenticate what he said, and I met through email, my first cousin, once removed. He is the son of my mother’s brother, the second of three sons.

This one cousin wrote to our extended family across the US, Canada, Israel, and Mexico, introducing me as Matildé’s youngest daughter, asking my newly found family to reach out to me. Because of the genealogy search, I’ve discovered over one hundred cousins- some first, second, third, and fourth, but a family, nonetheless. Undoubtedly, my investment in the testing
was well founded.

Between my father’s journal and the search for my mother’s family, I’ve authored a book based on some of the facts I’ve uncovered. While it is historical fiction, my book weaves a story of suspense and intrigue based on my father’s four-day excursion through Germany. By authoring this book, I The Road We Took 3D Book Covercan preserve some of the historical facts of my father’s trip along with certain aspects of my mom’s life before coming to the United States.

I’ve felt it is of the utmost importance to preserve my family’s history for posterity’s sake. This book is a legacy for future generations.

I am the first person in my family to author a book.

https://cathyalewis.com/

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You can get Cathy’s book at various book outlets including those below.

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Kevin Vought Author of I’m Supposed to Make a Difference. His story.

I'm Supposed To Make A Difference Book CoverI grew up looking like a very average kid. I lived most of my young life in the suburbs of Rochester, New York. That’s over on the western side of the state along the shores of Lake Ontario for those who aren’t familiar with the state.

My household included my parents, a brother who was about two and a half years older than me, and, of course, me. We almost always had a pet. At least one cat, two for a while, and a dog for a short time.

My parents weren’t rich, but they weren’t poor, either. We never went hungry, but we often didn’t have as many frills as some of my friends. For most of my childhood, my parents shared one car. We all shared a single bathroom with one sink. I don’t think either of those things were all that unusual back then, but seem relatively rare today.

My brother, Bryan, and I spent hours playing basketball at our hoop in the driveway and easily as much time throwing the football around in the backyard. We were closer than most brothers I knew and spent a lot of time challenging each other to be better athletes or just hanging out listening to music and playing games.

On the surface, it all looked very idyllic. If you threw in a white picket fence and a fresh baked pie every night, we would have looked like a typical 1960’s sitcom family.

You know that saying “don’t judge a book by its cover?” Of course you do. It never fit a situation better than it did with my family. The simple smiles flashed to the outside world were nothing more than a front to hide hearts as black as coal. Monsters barren of souls who were masters of covering their tracks to avoid discovery.

You may be thinking those sentiments are too strong. My own wife, Jill, didn’t believe me at first when I began digging up old memories. “Parents don’t do those things to their children,” she would say. “I’ve met your parents, they’re very nice people,” she would mistakenly add. Finally, in 2007, Jill pleaded with my father via email to reach out to me and help me through digesting some terrible memories I was having about my paternal grandfather. He simply ignored the email. That was also a turning point in my relationship with him. After that point, as the years went on and my memories filled in more completely, my father began making up more and more ridiculous lies in an attempt to cover his tracks. Between the 2007 snub and his subsequent backtracking on so many things he had already said, Jill finally began to realize just how evil he really is.

What did my father do that was so egregious? Did he molest Bryan or me? Did he beat us? No. He feared my mother far too much to do those things. Through his actions, things he would say from time to time, and an email he sent me sometime around 2006, it became clear to me that he wanted to. He “abused” his significantly younger siblings when they were growing up. “It’s what I learned” he emailed me. I’m certain he never “unlearned” it. My mother made it extremely clear to him, though, that she would come at him with absolutely everything she had, legally or otherwise, if he so much as looked at Bryan or me again the way he did one day. On that day when I was only about five, he was clearly ramping up to do a lot more than just yell at Bryan and me. She clearly wore the pants in the family, though, and she very well controlled most of his actions and kept him in line to the best of her ability.

What could my father do that was so wrong and so damaging under the iron fist surveillance of my mother? It appears that my father knew my mother’s strength and convictions from the beginning of their relationship. As such, he never told her what kind of person his father was. My father went to great lengths to hide his upbringing from my mother. Not only did he hide what kind of person his father was, he demanded that we spend every Saturday out there with them along with most holidays. When I say we spent the day, we went out there immediately after eating an early breakfast and we stayed out there until midnight or later. My father would typically spend the day alone with his father talking in the back work room or garage. Mind you, my grandfather is a well known violent pedophile who would go as far as threatening to kill my dad and his six siblings whenever they got too out of line. The first red flag: my father enjoyed this violent pedophile’s company and time to an extreme level.

There was more to my father keeping his past secret than wanting to visit with this violent pedophile on a routine basis. When I was still quite young, my father convinced my mother that Bryan and I should be sent to his parent’s place for at least two weeks to “have fun out in the country.” Had she known what my grandfather was all about, she clearly would never have allowed the weekly family visits, let alone leaving Bryan and me alone with this nut job. I have little doubt my father was delivering us to his father so he could live vicariously through his father’s actions. I also have little doubt that he got an earful about what happened during the two weeks we were trapped there on his Saturday visits.

You’re probably wondering now what in the world happened while we were there. It’s not even what you’re likely thinking. To me, it’s a lot worse. In the summer of 1980, I was seven years old. I have had nightmares indicating that my grandfather may have molested me, but I’ve never reconnected to those memories if he had. What I do remember is a lot worse. He abducted an eleven year old girl while I was alone with him. My brother was out of the house all day with my grandmother running errands. I believe the girl lived relatively close by and was a friend of Bryan’s and mine.

He attacked her and forced me to stay in the room with them. As she screamed, the guilt of doing nothing overwhelmed me. I knew helping her would likely end in my death, but I refused to stand there and do nothing. When I awoke from being knocked unconscious, she was gone. I’ve never been able to confirm whether she survived the attack or not, but I think I’ve found her with the help of a private investigator – alive and well today. She won’t respond to my emails or outreaches on Facebook. Presumably she’s not in a place where she wants to pick at that scab.

You at least had your mother to run to, right? Not exactly. My mother always looked out for me in the big things, such as keeping me safe from my father and worrying about why I came home with my face completely swelled up when I was seven. In other matters, though, I was pretty much her verbal punching bag.

My mother almost desperately wanted a daughter. She was convinced I was going to be a daughter. From the moment I was born, she became suicidally depressed. She never was able to move past the disappointment and lambasted me for everything I did. Even when I’d get 100% on a test, she would point out how lazy and stupid I was for only getting 95% the week before. After all, she reasoned, this 100% clearly showed I was capable of being perfect all the time. Talk about setting the bar high!

I knew she would blame me for the little girl’s death if I told her about it, so I kept my mouth shut. That wasn’t easy to do because she wouldn’t stop examining my swollen face for days. She even took me to the doctor to have it examined to see if my father’s excuse that I had been exposed to poison ivy in smoke was realistic.

All this and a lot more is described in much better detail in I’m Supposed to Make a Difference: A Memoir About Overcoming Trauma and Abuse. The book includes excerpts from emails I’ve exchanged with my father, greater details of all the situations described here plus more, and discussions of how this affected my mental health. The discussions on mental health include sections about suicidal feelings I battled from 11th grade through to about 2019. It lays out how I managed to work through the suicidal depression and anxiety with the help of a wonderful psychologist (who wrote a great foreword for the book) and an extremely knowledgeable psychiatrist (who wrote a wonderful afterword for the book). I’m hopeful the book will serve as motivation for others fighting with similar childhood traumas.

You can find the book here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09C3Z7XC5. Released on Tuesday September 7 in paperback and Kindle. The Audiobook version is being produced and will be available soon!